Hi Julena, I really like your approach to this creative question. When I read it, it almost reminded me of a television program in the 90’s called “Boy Meets World”, when you wrote, “How experiencing new things will lead us to emotions we’ve never felt before”. The way you have used short and sharp syntax pops out at someone who reads it. It isn’t boring nor too long that someone would get distracted, it is just the right amount. However, for next time maybe expressing or even elaborating on what you mean by “teach us the way of the world.”. If you do that it may open another underlying theme of the book such as lack of experience of the world surrounding young people. As well maybe a photo or a quote even, portraying someone’s disinterest to what Mr Gradgrind is teaching in the class. Overall you’ve done a great job!